Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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