I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
