I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
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