spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Holy sore nipples Batman
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
