TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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