did you get engaged???
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Randomize