I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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