They should really pass out barf bags in church
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
