i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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