Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
