College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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