I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize
