Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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