She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
