We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
