So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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