Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
