I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
