At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize