If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
