Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
