so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
