Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
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