Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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