what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
