Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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