why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
