You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Randomize