there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
