did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
