They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize