This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Is it because I queefed?
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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