you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
