Please don't use social media to get back at me.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
They have beer where we have blood.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Randomize
