out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
