This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
You have to summon your inner elephant
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
