Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
