How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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