Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Randomize
