I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
And then he peed in my hair
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
