everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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