I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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