I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
