Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
