haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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