i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
