i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Randomize
