I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
