wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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