it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
He did a backflip because drugs
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize